Some things are timeless indeed. My forefathers brought certain things from the Emerald Isle that persist to this very day in fact! A Pint of plain, was, and still is the very same Guiness. Celtic gold work is still among the finest made. Celt whisky, be it Irish or Scot, is, and always be, ambrosia…
1c of dark brown sugar
1c (2 sticks) butter
1c of granulated sugar
4 large eggs
2c of dried fruit, such as dried cranberries or raisins
1tsp fresh lemon juice
1c coarsely chopped walnuts or pecans
2c all-purpose flour
1 bottle Knappogue Castle
Take a large bowl, sample the Knappogue Castle to be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink.
Turn on the electric mixer… beat one cup of butter in a large bowl. Add one teaspoon of sugar. Beat again.
At this point it’s best to make sure the is still OK, try another cup, just in case.
Turn off the mixerer thingy. Break 2 legs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit. Pick the frigging fruit off floor…
Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the etrrs, just pry it loose with a drewscriver.
Sample the Knappogue Castle to check for tonsisticity.
Next, sift two cups of salt, or something.
Check the Knappogue Castle.
Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Add a schpoon of sugar, or somefink… whatever you can find.
Grease the oven. Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over.
Don’t forget to beat off the turner.
Finally, throw the bowl through the window, FINISH the Knappogue Castle and make sure to put the stove in the dishwasher.